When I came here, I told myself I will write so many things about my life in here. I told my self, I will document every thing and keep it here. But I haven't written a lot since I came here.
Living alone isn't a new thing for me. Having lived at a boarding house way back in college, I think I know what it feels like to live alone. Or so I thought.
Here, it is totally different. From billboards that I cannot understand, to bus schedules that I usually don't need, to labels on grocery items that I can't read, to a bookstore that has limited items that I can understand, to people that would barely understand a word I say, to a literally cold and almost empty home I come to every day.
My tita warned me about moments that I will cry incessantly because I would miss home. I sure am. I am missing home and the crying moments would start when I am at home alone.
On my day offs, I would frequent Daiso and pick of things I can buy for my little space. As if anything I put in it, would make it feel the warmth of a home. I try to put wall decors with vibrant colors, as if that would put life in it. I bought a ukulele out of whim coz I thought, I just needed to keep myself occupied so I wont feel empty.
I would lay in bed usually up until 3pm, doing nothing but scrolling and scrolling on my phone. Curled up in that little space, forgetting my promise to myself to explore the new place I am at. Sulking into loneliness.
Usual routes would consist of work, grocery, window shopping at Aeon Mall or that second hand shop 15 minutes bike-ride away from me.
One Thursday morning, I veered away from that usual day off routine and rode a train towards this highly-recommended daytrip onsen experience at a 3-star hotel. I was glad I did that. They have Ladies Day on Thursdays and so I got a discount for using the onsen and the gym. But since my weekday offs are erratic, I would probably have to wait for the next month to get that Thursday off. Or maybe, I could just jump into the train again and just go there. The discount isn't that much anyway compared to what relaxation it can give. After all, it's the best pampering I could give myself for now. But I wish I can do it with my mom and sisters too, someday.
Two months and counting, I should not pressure myself onto scribing my experience and realizations with this chapter of my life. It is still anew and there's a lot to discover. From language acquisition, to lifestyle check, to establishing a career and investments and finding love or me having to be found.
One thing is for sure, this place has good people, I just need to be careful who to trust.