Sigh.

Random.
8:52PM

Today is the 31st of March 2014. For some, today officially marks the last day of the school year and the  start of a month-long vacation. 

I did not go to school today. I have pending SF5 defects in the entries that should have been taken care of today. But I chose not to go to school.

I haven't made up my mind in taking MA units this opening of the school year. 

I haven't made up my mind if I will transfer to my dream school for the continuation of my Masteral Studies or if  I should start looking for job opportunities elsewhere, in preparation for future employment after this fellowship. 

Should I stay here or go somewhere else?

I tried online dating. But I seem to freak out or would lose interest in the conversation whenever the topic goes to relationships or beyond friendship. What's wrong with me?

I have been sleeping a lot lately. Or just wanna stay in bed, all day long. 

I had been planning to jog but I can't seem to have the energy to do so.

I want to cut my hair, but I told myself that for once in my life, I'll have it long. 

I should start cleaning up and sorting out the papers used last school year. 

I want to lose weight. I wanna be able to wear the dress I had been keeping in my closet for a long time, but never had the chance because I can't fit in it.

Am I depressed? I had been eating ice cream every day.

Random.
9:10PM 





Hindi Natitinag ang Pusong Pilipino




Sino sainyo ang nakikita ang sarili nya, 10-15 years mula ngayon, babalik dito sa Malinao National HS, at magsasalita sa harapan bilang guest speaker? Ako, noon pa man, na-picture ko na ang sarili kong  babalik ako sa Alma Mater ko. I will make my High School proud of me. But I never thought it will be so soon. When Mam Margie, asked me if I can come here and be the Guest Speaker on the Recognition Day, I asked, “Bakit po ako?” and sabi nya lang, “kasi nagbubuklit kami ng mga yearbooks, looking for alumnaes to invite as speaker tapos nakita namin yung name mo.” Buti na lang hindi “Wala na kaming ibang choice" ang sagot nya. Di ko na pinalampas ang pagkakataon kasi isa talaga ito sa mga nakasulat sa bucket list ko.

It is an honor to speak in front of everyone here today- my former teachers, awardees, honorees and achievers. Para sainyo talaga ang araw na ito.

I texted Tita, “Di ko alam ang sasabihin ko. L-o-l”  Nagreply naman sya, “Magsulat ka about the Theme, at kailangan mo silang ma-inspire.” Eto yung pinaka-mahirap na challenge. Eto na yun.  Pano ko gagawin yun.

Malinao National High School, formerly known as Balza National High School is  a home for me. Here, I had realized potentials I never knew I had. I am forever grateful to my high school teachers for believing in me, for showing me the possibilities that I can do more, for pushing me to be the best student that I can be.  Let me take this chance to express my gratitude to this academe and the people behind it. Today, I will share a part of myself and my journey as a new teacher. I will speak hoping to inspire you not with my life but to help you find your own source of inspiration to keep moving forward and never stop achieving. Today, I will share to all of you my own many whys. Why I keep standing firm with my beliefs and advocacy.

Hindi natitinag ang pusong Pilipino.

Hindi na natin kailangang lumayo para patunayan yan. Hindi na kelangang pumunta sa Mindanao at maantig kung paano lumalaban ang mga sundalong Pilipino para mapanatili ang kapayaan. Di na kelangan mag-interview ng mga OFWs at alamin kung paano sila nakikibaka sa kalungkutan dagdagan pa ng racial discrimination makapagpadala lamang ng pera sa pamilyang naiwan sa Pilipinas.. Di na kelangang pumunta pa ng Eastern Visayas at panoorin kung paanong ang mga kababayan natin ay nagsusumikap ibalik ang mga buhay nila sa normal pagktapos masalanta ng Super Typhoon Yolanda—Ang buhay mismo natin ay isang patunay ng hindi na titinag na pusong Pinoy. At kung tutuusin, napakasimple lang ng mga element ng di matinag-tinag na Pusong Pilipino.

 Tanong nga ng Nescafe, “Para kanino ka bumabangon?”

Ngayong unang taon ko ng pagtuturo, unang napagtanto ko, Mga Mahal naming mga magulang, kayo ang pinaka-effective na teachers. Kung paano nyo kami iminulat, yun ang magiging gabay namin sa pagtanda. Dinagdagan pa ng mga turo ng mga teachers natin. Salamat. Salamat kasi binuhay nyo kami at binigyan ng pagkakataong maranasang mabuhay sa malupit na mundong ito. Salamat sa paghubog nyo samin maging matatag, palaban at hindi nawawalan ng pag-asa.

Teaching is a thankless job. Verbally, I guess. Bilang bagong guro, nasabi ko na sa sarili ko, hindi nila kelangan bumalik at ipagmalaki sakin kung anuman ang magiging karangalan nila sa darating na panahon. Basta, maging mabuting mamamayan sila ng Pilipinas balang-araw, nagbabayad ng tamang buwis, nagtatrabaho, responsable—isang mabuting tao, hindi pasaway—yun na siguro yung pinakamalaking pasasalamat na matatanggap ko. Pagdating ng panahon.

Hindi mo kelangan maging isang sikat na engineer, architect, astronaut, artista, o ubod ng yaman para maipakitang naging mabuting estudyante ka. Pero wala nang sasarap pa sa pakiramdam ng dati mong teacher kung magiging isa ka sa mga iyon. Parang tinupad mo na rin ang isang pangarap ko nung bata pa ako.

I teach Grade 3, and this is the best age to ask them what they want to be in the future—usually, tatlo lang ang alam nilang propesyon na kayang abutin—Teacher, Pulis o kaya Sundalo.  Ginawa kong misyon ko bilang guro nya na imulat ang kanyang kalinangan sa iba pang posibilidad bukod sa pagiging basurero.. Para sa isang guro, anuman ang gusto mo maging paglaki mo, basta ipangako mong magiging mabuti kang tao—responsible, matapat at may takot sa Diyos, sabi nga ni Vice Ganda, “Push mo yan.”

Bakit kelangan unahin ang kabutihan?  Base sa Law of Attraction ni Rhonda Byrne, kung anong iniisip mo, yan ang darating sayo.  Sa Law of Interaction naman ni Albert Einstein, kung anong force ang in-apply mo, yan din ang babalik sayo. Kaya kung nagtanim ka ng kabutihan, asahan mong kabutihan din ang babalik sayo. Biblically naman, sabi “Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you.

Bakit hindi tayo natitinag? Kasi alam natin na lahat ng paghihirap natin, may patutunguhan.

Kung anumang relihiyon ang kinabibilangan mo, tandaan mong ang pananampalataya sa Maykapal ang nagpapanatili sayong maging matatag at babalik pa rin tayo dun---nagsasabi sayong maging mabuting tao.

Sa class ko, diverse ng religious affiliations nila—Muslims, INCs, Christians, Catholics. Sa murang edad, kelangan matutunan nilang i-respeto ang paniniwala ng bawat isa.  Ang sarap pagmasdan ang pagbuka ng mga bibig nila habang inuusal ang kani-kanilang mga dalangin. Pagkatapos nun, balik ang classroom sa pagiging isang Park—Jurrasic Park—bawat bata may kanya-kanyang version ng dinosaur.

Hindi ko sila hinihingan ng monetary donations, kasi alam ko naming salat din sila sa buhay. Pero one time, nakita ko sila nagkukumpulan, syempre nagalit kunwari ako, at inutusan silang bumalik sa kanilang mga upuan, pero nung nakita kong may mga pera kinokolekta, nagalit na talaga ko, tinanong ko kung para saan yun, sabi nung isa “Idodonate po namin sa mga biktima ng Yolanda.” Speechless ako. Kapag teacher ka, dapat mabilis ka mag-isip, sabi ko na lang, “Sige, kolektahin mo kung magkano man yan at dagdagan ko na lang, tapos idodonate natin sa Red Cross.”

That day, we were able to collect 99.75Php, which I donated to Red Cross in Quezon City. At alam nating nakatulong iyon sa patuloy na pagbangon ng Visayas. Barya-barya, pero pag pinagsama-sama yung mga barya ng mga bata sa buong Pilipinas, limpak-limpak. A single drop can make ripples, sabi ni Mother Theresa.

Kayo, bilang mga bagong leaders, you are given the power to change and influence those who are around you. Be the droplet of influence that can send ripples of change. Tiwala lang. Katulad ng pagtitiwala namin sainyong mga guro na kaya nyong abutin ang mga pangarap nyo.

Bakit hindi tayo natitinag? Kasi marunong tayong makisabay.

Modern Age na, kung saan ang lahat ay napakabilis mangyari. Everything is in a click of a finger. At sabi nga ng may-ari ng Facebook na si Mark Zuckerberg, “Connection is not the endpoint. It is what connection can bring.”

Matutong pumili ng mga pagbabagong dapat yakapin. Hindi lahat dapat sabayan. Nasa edukasyon ang sagot sa kahirapan.

I teach kids who live places that are considered high-risk and high need areas in Quezon City. At kapag tinanong mo sila kung bakit nila gustong makatapos ng pag-aaral, ang isasagot lang naman nila “Para po makatulong ako sa mga magulang ko.” “Para po hindi na magtinda ng basahan si mama.” At iba pang mga sagot na kapupulutan ng pag-asa.

Pasasalamat. Pananampalataya. Pagbabago. Pag-asa. Higit sa lahat, pagmamahal. Hindi matitinag ang pusong Pilipino dahil marunong tayong magmahal ng lubos.

Kelan dapat umibig? Sabi ni Ramon Bautista, kapag 19 ka na. Na-19tindihan mo na ang mga bagay-bagay. Kung hindi pa, aral-aral muna. Wag sayangin ang pagkakataong mahalin ang iyong sarili  makapagtapos ng pag-aral upang makatulong sa iba.

Bata pa tayo. Syempre, kasama talaga ako.

At pare-pareho tayong marami pang gustong abutin sa buhay.  Ako, gusto kong makatapos ng Masteral studies, makapag-photoshoot sa Batanes, makapag-dive sa Jolo, Sulu, gusto ko pang akyatin ang Kota Kinabalu sa Malaysia, makasakay at makapagpalipad ng Ultra Lightweight Aircraft sa Clark, Pampanga sa birthday ko. Marami pang iba. Basta marami pang iba.

Paano nga bang hindi matinag?  Paano nga bang hindi sumuko?

Nung isang linggo, reorganization sa paaralan kung san ako nagtuturo. Ang mga bata ay pupunta sa kanilang mga classroom sa susunod na baitang para makilala ang kanilang mga magiging bagong kaklase at guro. Pagkatapos ng klase, nakasalubong ko ang mga estudyante ko at ang pinakamaliit sa kanila, si Regine ay may inabot saking nakatuping Grade 3 na papel. Pagbukas ko, eto ang nakasulat:

Salamat po Teacher Cat dahil kung wala po kayo, hindi po kami matututo.
Sinuportahan mo kami sa pagsubok.

Hanep diba, ang mga bata ngayon, may konsepto na ng pagsubok.

Paano nga bang hindi matinag?

Ang masasabi kong pinaka-susi sa kung anong meron ako ngayon ay ang turo ng tita ko sakin. Back in high school, she would always remind me to READ. READ. Tita Ondet, whom you all know as Mrs. Lourdes Belchez Colasi, thank you for letting me know the value of reading. Not just for academic achievement but for its value in my life as a whole.

Sa grades 1 and 2, ang mga bata ay tinuturuang  magbasa. Sa grade 3, ang natututo sila mula sa pagbabasa. Pero sa klase ko, nung pasukan, halos kalahati sa 50 na studyante ay hindi marunong magbasa o kaya naman ay napakabagal magbasa. Anong resulta? Kaliwa’t-kanang iyakan, suntukan, away, basta, sobrang gulo. Nasabi ko sa sarili ko, ano ba tong pinasok ko?! Bakit ba sila ganun ka-pasaway? Kasi nga hindi sila marunong magbasa. Hindi nila maintindihan ang mga letra. Ang first grading period ko, halos naubos lang sa pagpapabasa sa kanila. It’s all worth it. The class has been more behaved.  Sa totoo lang, I can talk endlessly about my class, about my teaching experience, about how I learned and how I am continually learning.

Naalala ko madalas sabihin ni Mrs. Balute nung estudyante pa ako dito, “Wag magpa-alipin sa libro, alipinin ang libro.” Ang pagkahilig sa pagbabasa ng iba’t-ibang mga lathalain ay magbubukas sa ating kamalayan sa napalawak na dimension ng pagkatuto. Lalo na sa panahon ngayon ng Age of Information. Lahat pwedeng mahanap sa internet, lahat pwedeng mabasa. Tandaan, iba ang kaalaman sa impormasyon. Hindi lahat ng impormasyon importante, pwedeng ang iba ay chismis lamang. Pero ang kaalaman, yan ang dapat hanapin, yan ang totoo. Sabi pa ni Lourd De Veyra, sa panahon ngayon, bawal ang mangmang. Bawal ang tanga.

Pano pang hindi matitinag?

Makinig at sumunod sa nakakatanda.
The old adage, “Papunta ka pa lang, pabalik na ko” sobrang classic at sobrang totoo.  Find yourself a mentor or mentors. When I was here, my mentors are my two titas and teachers. When I moved back to Manila, my father and mother  are my ultimate teachers. These people know more about life than what I currently know.  They never fail to tell me the best advice: PRAY and TRUST YOURSELF. LAHAT NG DESISYON, KELANGAN KAYA MONG PANINDIGAN.

Paano pang hindi matitinag?

Get Connected.

Build yourself a support group. Surround yourself with people who understand you and your cause.
Self motivation is important, but being surrounded with people and reason to move forward is another thing. Hindi natin kaya mag-isa.  At saka sabi sa Lego Movie: Everything is awesome, Everything is awesome if you’re part of a team.
Kung di mo pa napapanood, panoorin mo na.
Life is good but it can still get better if you do your part in making it a better one.

Ultimately:

Never lose the faith—In God and in yourself. The Bible verse of my life: Philippians 4:13, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Malayo-layo pa ang tatahakin. Malayo-layo pa ang byahe ng buhay para sa atin. Sampung taon mula ngayon, malay nyo, isa sainyo dyan sa mga nakaupo at nakikinig ngayon ang sya namang papalit sa akin dito. Harinawa. Sana nga. Umaasa ako. Umaasa ang bawat guro natin.

So, Read. Listen. Connect. Have Faith. Hangga’t meron tayo nyan, hindi tayo matitinag.

Let me end this speech with a Bob Ong quote:
Tuparin ang mga pangarap. Obligasyon mo yan sa sarili mo.

Again, congratulations and thank you. Mabuhay tayong lahat!

Speech delivered during the 44th Recognition Exercises of Malinao National High School, Malinao Albay, March 26, 2014.

Runtime: 16:02 minutes




Regine's Letter




Dear Regine,

I am not yet ready to let go because I feel like I haven't really taught you all a lot. Most of our times in class are consumed by reminding each of you how to properly behave inside the classroom. Or I have to be pulled out of the class because of some urgent meetings. Or fire/earthquake drills. There were even days that I felt like giving up.

I can only hope that all of you learned something from me. From all of us, your grade three teachers.

Because, me, Teacher Kat, learned a lot from all of you.

You may be the smallest in the class, but your voice has the highest pitch. At first, your classmates laughed at you because of your Visayan accent, but later on admire you because you were the fastest to learn English and Science. I will always remember you to be that kid whom I would always spend longer time practicing pronunciation because you keep forgetting them. I will do it repeatedly until you get it right. You had never given up on me. Never got mad. Never cried because I push you too hard to speak it right.

Thank you. If not because of you and your classmates, I wouldn't be having this pride of being a teacher. It is not a thankless job after all.

Thank you. For understanding that I can't really do everything. For keeping silent when I make that "teacher look" because I don't wanna shout or bang the desk anymore. Thank you for speaking out loud your thoughts and answers to my questions. Answers that would make us all laugh, ask more questions or simply make me feel that oh my, I am making you all think!

My dream for each of you is to fulfill your personal dreams and aspirations in life. Many years from now, I hope to see each of you happy and successful and ultimately, may you all grow up to be good and responsible citizens, partners and family members. If you ever become rich and famous, may you have the heart to extend your fortunes to the less fortunate and make your life an inspiration to others. But you need not be rich and famous at all. Just be happy with the life you have chosen.

As you all grow older, you would forget all about me since I am just one of the many teachers that will come into your academic life.

You were all my firsts in my first year of teaching and that will be hard to forget and let go. You were part of my first highs and lows as a teacher. You were part of my learning as a person. You are one of the many reasons why I teach and strive hard with others in making this country's educational system right.

So, thank you.

Years from now, remember that you have a Cher Kat to come home to.

Wishing you all the best,
Cher Kat

Bitin: This Is How It Feels

I woke up an hour late. Yes, Five am is already late for me. I am suppose to be up by 4am, taken a bath by 4:30am, packed bags by 5:00, had coffee by 5:10am and ready to go by 5:30am. But today, I woke up late with allergies, so my eyes are red and bulging like I cried last night, my nose is itchy had turned red because of rubbing it. Popping antihistamine is not a choice because I have to stay awake for the rest of the day.I stepped out of the house by 6am, took a cab and grabbed breakfast from a McDo drive thru. Honestly, I am already on weekend mode after finishing all the deliverables yesterday. I had not prepared anything to teach. No nothing. Afloat. This is how it feels. Today is the first day of the Reorganization in school. For the next three days, we are to accommodate the incoming grade 2 kids. But before that, we have to send off our kids to their new rooms as they step up to grade 4. Every time, we reach the door of a room, I tell the designated kids to fall in line in front of me. I tap their heads one-by-one and say, "Magpapakabait kayo sa bago nyong class. Gagalingan nyo." Then off they go in. One of my girl students, hugged me before getting inside her new classroom. Another one, bid me goodbye, probably, 4 times. Until I showed my "teacher look" face so he would stay inside his new classroom. He was the repeater in my class. Now, I'm happy he was able to move up. Like a proud momma I am! This is how it feels. Next year, I will be a special teacher. I won't have an advisory class anymore. What a relief! Did I just say that?! Writing and filling out several forms endlessly is so tiresome. Makes me wish I have my old job back. No wonder, the administrative office has been clamoring for it as early as February to get started and done with. Around 9am, the newly appointed advisers welcomed their kids. Since I won't be handling a class on my own, I secluded myself and started writing this. I was wondering what I could do to help when my co-teacher ask if I can help them with their class since she and her partner teacher are still finishing their forms. I told myself that I won't be that sweet teacher that I was when the school year started. I'll make sure they will have fear in me. Hehehe. As I have said earlier, I really don't have anything planned for the day. From my first year of teaching, I learned that kids love doodling more than anything else. They can doodle while talking, they can doodle with friends, they can doodle alone. I gave each of them a clean sheet of paper, told them to write their names and draw something that is their favorite. Last year, I had 51 kids. Today, they welcomed 60 pupils, 7 kids were absent. What else to do for the remaining 1.5 hours? I called them one by one to read. Since they are 60 in class, making them read an entire paragraph will be time-consuming. So, I just let them read a sentence. With that one sentence I can already consider if they are a reader, a slow reader or a non-reader. I collected their doodles and called them one by one, looking at their handwriting, I had made assumptions if they are readers or non-readers. But of course, there are really kids who have very bad handwriting but can readily read. Sixteen boys honestly said that they cannot read what's on the paper. One of the girls, just held the paper and look at me and said that she can't read it. Anothe girl tried to read from the first word but failed to read the next 2-syllable word. 

"Si Kiko Kalabaw ay ......." I told myself: "Here's the new set of challenge!" 

All because of Mass Promotion! They stepped to grade three not because they worked hard for it but because, the government mandated it! Badtrip. This is how it feels. I wonder how my 48 kids are doing in their new classes... Are they ok? Will they miss me? Outside the classroom, my Escuero kids were waiting for me. Regine, the smallest in the group, handed me a folded paper. Cher: Anong ginawa nyo kanina? Regine: ..... (giggles)..... pinabasa po kami. Joana: nag-drawing po. Jihoo: Cher, classmate po pala namin si Jamaliah! Cher: Pinabasa ba kayo? Jihoo: Opo! Cher: Ikaw Joana, nakabasa ka? Joana: (with a shy grin...) Opo Cher! Regine: English pa nga Cher! I hugged Joana! Imagine my #teacherkilig feeling at that moment! She is one of the few kids I offered to extend afternoon reading classes with. Those afternoon classes were actually limited. There were days I had to cancel because I had other things to do. Office to go to. Or just too tired. On those days, I give her and the other reading materials. Or pull them out of classes so they can watch and listen to nursery rhymes and other videos. They like it better than being in the class. Hahaha... Another set of Escuero kids ambushed me in the hallway. Cher: Oh kumusta? Nagawan nyo ba ng paraan na maging classmate si Patricia? Dyna: Hindi po Cher. Nilipat sya dun sa kabila. Cher: Anong ginawa nyo kanina? Mary: Pinabasa po kami. Ang lakas nga naming tatlo magbasa! Una po si Xyvz, mahina lang. Tapos si Dyna, medyo malakas, tapos nung ako na, ang lakas ko magbasa! Cher: Anong binasa nyo? Dyna: English po. Mary: Tignan mo si Teacher Kat, maiiyak na naman. (Pointing at my face) Cher: Oh galingan nyo dun ah! Dapat bibo kids kayo dun! Magsiuwi na kayo! At Teacher Nikki's Room: Patrick: Ang swerte ng mga bagong grade 3. Mababait ang mga teachers nila. Me: Akalain mo, grade 4 ka na! Pakabait ka dun. I don't have separation anxiety. I decided to have lunch at SM Fairview which is more of SM FARview. Just for a change. And then, I decided to read Regine's letter.

Saturdaythought 03.15.2014


Happy Birthday Ms. B of Balutmanila :) :) :) You are doing well in your 365 Blog Challenge! Keep it up and may you always be blessed. 

I was checking on the Raging Fire video posted by Olivr on his blog and saw this video on the Suggestions box. I told myself I’m gonna check it out right after I watch the Phillip Phillips video, did just that and told myself that I wanna answer that same questions in a blog post. However, I stopped because I still have some school paperwork to deal with and I can only write after I am done with the stuff  I promised to finish today. Didn’t realize that writing a post as a reward would work for me. Lol. OR maybe it was just the topic that really fuelled up my will. Lels.



It is my first time to watch The Science of Love by Soulpancake in Youtube. The Kid President had always been a favorite, a show also made by Soulpancake. As per Wikipedia, Soulpancake.com offers discussion, blog posts, questions, creative activities, writing exercises, poll, interviews, columns, videos, original art by up-and-coming artists. Discussions are open to all registered members, regardless of gender, sexuality, religion, etc. I prefer selecting the topics on Youtube though. Randomly.


The Single Life: The Science of Love questions I would like to answer myself.  
1.      If you could wake up one day, would you be single or in a relationship?
My answer would not be different from that of the others, Of course, I wanna wake up In a Relationship J

2.      What are the qualities you look for in a partner?
This one is not really hard to answer:

a.      has good sense of humor
b.      adventurous
c.       responsible
d.      washes the dishes
e.       reads a lot
f.        knows how to cook
g.      honest
h.      a morning person


3.       What do you think it is that other people are looking for in a partner?
Someone that would fit their own personality in general. Someone who likes the idea of you and not molding you to be their ideal partner.

4.         Are all those qualities packed in a single person now?
Maybe. I don’t know. I took a time off from discovering that in one person for a little while now. I chose not to date anyone or even randomly. Maybe I'm too busy or too happy with whatever and whoever I have now in my circle. 

5.        Would you be willing to give him a call tell him that he has these qualities?
Not sure who to call. Lol

6.        How do you feel about taking a risk like that?
I’m totally GAME to take this risk. I just happen not to have anyone to take that risk on at the moment.

Go out and take a chance on somebody. We are a lot more alike than what we think. Everyone wants love but a lot of the ideas about how we get it, give it, sustain it are outdated, conflicting and kind of vague.- Julian of The Science of Love

Found this a good icebreaker as I work on completing the school yearend requirements.






I Know Right.


Kung ikaw ay Single, wala ka nang problem.
Sumama ka samin sa grupo na walang minamahal
Dun sa mga bitter, iniwan ng partner
O talagang ayaw isipin na may tao para sa kanya
Itaas ang kamay, mag-celebrate ng buhay
Sabay-sabay nating isigaw
CHORUS:
Ang sarap maging SINGLE
Ang sarap maging SINGLE
Ang sarap maging SINGLE
Pero mahirap ang mag isa…
Kung ikaw ay single, alam mo ang problem
In love ka sa bestfriend mo, pero di masabi-sabi ang totoo
Nabibitin, sayang ang friendship
Paano na ang feelings mo na di mo kayang ilabas
Itaas ang kamay, mag-celebrate ng buhay
balang araw tayo’y magkakaron ng iibigin
Itaas ang kamay, mag-celebrate ng buhay
Sabay-sabay nating isigaw
CHORUS:
Ang sarap maging SINGLE
Ang sarap maging SINGLE
Ang sarap maging SINGLE
Pero mahirap ang mag isa…
Hanggang, kailan ako maghihintay sayo?
Noon, ngayon, magpakailan pa man…
CHORUS 2:
Ayoko na maging SINGLE
Ayoko na maging SINGLE
Ayoko na maging SINGLE
Kasi mahirap, (mahirap)
Mahirap (mahirap)
Mahirap ang mag isa…

Dahil namiss ko magblogblogblogblog.

May internet na kami! Yahoo! After 3 days, muntik na bumula yung bibig ko. Lels.

Binisita ko yung isang kaibigan sa ospital nung isang araw. Naoperahan kasi sya. Laparoscopy yata yung tawag dun sa procedure na ginawa sa kanya. Paborito kong ospital ang TMC. Nung nightshift ako, halos taun-taon akong nako-confine dahil sa iba't-ibang sakit dulot ng stress at pabayang lifestyle (hanggang ngayon naman, pabaya pa din yata ako :( ) Salamat sa mga healthcard at life pension kong may rider ng hospitalization, na-experience ko ang alagang TMC, not just once, but thrice I think. Dumating sa point na gusto ko na lang lagi nasa ospital minus the syringe pag nadedepress ako at gusto ko ng katahimikan at kapag gusto ko magpahinga.

Anyway, napanood ko yung Starting Over Again diba, naka-relate ako sa Hospital Scene diba. At nung araw na yun, naglalakad ako sa loob ng ospital kung san nangyari ang lahat. Hindi ko naman balak mag emo at magtawag ng nega vibes that day. Habang nag-aabang sa may elevator, napapangiti na lang ako sa sarili ko dahil, andito na naman ako sa isa sa mga paborito kong lugar.

Di ko na maalala kung anong araw ako na-confine nun. Di ko na alam kung anong floor at room number. Di naman kasi masayang alaala, kaya dapat kalimutan na lang.

Nakaawang ang pintuan ng kwarto ng kaibigan ko, kumatok lang ako at pumasok na din. Nakita ko syang nakahiga at may katabing natutulog. Si mama naman nya ay inasikaso naman ako at binigyan ng makakain.

Kwento. Kwento. Kwento ng operasyon nya. Bawal sya tumawa, pero tawa pa din nang tawa. Ok lang naman daw. So kwento. Kwento. Tawa. Tawa. Chismis. Chismis. Daot. Daot. Ganyan. Balik chismis. Sabay biglang......

"Kumusta na pala si Sundot?"...
"Ha? Sundot?" tanong ko. Mej na lost ako sa tanong nya.
"Si --!!!"
"Ah.. Sorry na-lost ako, yun nga pala yung tawag nyo sa kanya"
"Grabe ka, nalimot mo na?"
"Eh ganito talaga pag naka-experience na ng anesthesia sa spinal cord. Hahaha"
"Mahaba na ba ang buhok nya?"
"Di ko alam. Di naman sya lumalabas sa newsfeed ko kung may update. Text mo na lang kaya"
(Oo friends kami sa fb. Nakakasawa din palang maging stalker.)
"Para kasing nakita ko sya sa Cash & Carry one time kaso may buhok, pero kamukha nya talaga tapos may dalang bata, nakangiti sakin pero di ko naman nginitian ulit kasi parang di naman sya yun."
"Ah. Baka may anak na."
"Kumustahin mo kaya." Udyok nya.
"Kita mo nga, nakalimutan ko na sya, tapos kukumustahin ko pa.. Anoberr... Masaya na yun for sure. Mas bet nya yung mga younger diba, so ayun, ikaw na lang kumumusta sa kanya." sabi ko.
"Malay mo naman, akala mo lang masaya sya dun."
(Aapila pa talaga)
"Eh pinili nya yun diba." pagtatapos ko sa usapan.

At dahil alam nyang wala na kong matinong maisasagot, nagchange topic na kami. Kwento about the kiddielets, my morning routine, future plans. Pakilala sa boyfriend nyang kagigising lang at natulog ulit sa tabi nya. At pak! Alas siete na ng gabi, kelangan ko na umuwi.

Pagkalimot ba ay katumbas ng pag-move on? O sadyang makakalimutin lang talaga ko?

Ayan, extended ang Febdrama sa March. Lels. Of course not! Nalulunod ako sa papel! Napakaraming papel at napakaraming sulatin! Ano ba to, ginawa na ngang online, umaapila pa din ang mga primitives na magpasa ng written outputs! Argghh.. doble trabaho, right? Ok lang, napapractice ang handwriting ko, ang ganda ko na magsulat. Lols, pero computerized pa din ang LPs ko. Wahahahaah

Confirmed na. Hello Pangasinan sa buwan ng Mayo! Bilang ako ay volunteer tumulong para sa mga new teachers na papasok.

Sobrang random lang. Namiss ko kaya magblog. Andami kong gustong ishare kasi andaming ganap ng Feb. Nakapanood ako ng Rak of Aegis! Nakaakyat ng bundok. Nakapanood ng sine. Nakapag-kape sa peborit spot ko sa Taguig. Nagkasakit din dahil nag work hard KUNO ako. Tsk.

At ni-welcome ko ang March ng panonood ng first ever Short + Sweet Manila 2014 Week 1. A series of 10-minute plays. Gusto ko pa manood ng Week 2 sa Friday, kaso I told myself, magpapaka-ermitanya ko this March para makagala ako ng bongga sa Bicol pag-uwi ko sa April.

Tsaka na ko magbloghop. Hmm......

posted from Bloggeroid